Chaos and Charm

(aka: Why I Clench My Jaw in My Sleep)

There’s a special place in the universe for people who work in customer service.
Not heaven, not hell — just a weird in-between dimension where you answer emails while questioning your life choices.

My days are spent in chat windows and inboxes, typing like I’m defusing a bomb while pretending to be calm and collected.
It’s a delicate mix of therapy, tech support, and spiritual warfare.

It always starts the same:
“Hi there 😊 I totally understand your frustration!”
Translation: I’ve read your 47-paragraph essay about how your order was delivered to your porch but somehow ‘never arrived,’ and I’m trying not to lose it.

Some customers are angels — patient, kind, actually human.
And then there are… the others.
The ones who enter the inbox like it’s a battleground.
They’re mad, they’ve got time, and they’re ready to copy-paste their complaint three different ways just to make sure you feel it.

You take a deep breath, re-read the email that begins with “LISTEN!!!” and ends with “I EXPECT A RESPONSE IMMEDIATELY!!!”
Meanwhile, I’m over here crafting a reply that sounds professional but reads like a hostage note with punctuation therapy:

“We completely understand your concern.”
Translation: You are currently the bane of my existence, ma’am!

The real kicker?
They’ll rage-type a manifesto… then follow it up with,
“Thanks so much!” or worse, “Ty”
Like we didn’t just spiritually fistfight in the inbox.

And yet — we stay.
Because for every unhinged message, there’s one genuinely sweet customer who says,

“You’ve been so kind — thank you for your help,”
and suddenly you forget all the others (for at least five minutes).

It’s not just customer service — it’s character development.
It’s emotional Pilates.
It’s spiritual warfare.
It’s the art of sounding cheerful while silently Googling,
“How to professionally say ‘it’s not even that deep, girl.’”

So no, I don’t meditate anymore.
I respond to strangers who type entire paragraphs in ALL CAPS!!! like I’m not one click away from screaming into the void —
and that’s growth, mama.🧘🏽‍♀️

Snap.